Advice to New Teachers: Have a Good Therapist
In a recent conversation, one of my students remarked, “I am a big believer in psychotherapy. I wouldn’t want to try to get through life without some supervision.” I laughed in agreement, being a big fan of psychotherapy myself. And, I recognized the term supervision from my previous work as a counselor at a women’s treatment center. The counseling staff had a senior therapist to speak with about our caseload and about our personal issues that were arising in the process of helping others. We referred to this support as “supervision.”
If you are lucky as a yoga teacher, you will have a senior teacher of whom you can ask questions and who supports you in your growth. Equally awesome is when you have truthful collegial friendships with whom you honestly share the ups and downs of your teaching life. That being said, these kinds of relationships seem to be more rare than common among both new and long-time teachers. Whether it is because we are so busy commodifying our happiness that we don’t share vulnerably when business is down, when we are in conflict with students (or them with us), or when we are experiencing any of the inevitable challenges of sustained participation in transformational community when that community is also wrapped up in business, or some more personal explanation, the reasons why such relationships are rare are too numerous to name. And, even if you are one of the lucky ones who has a mentor or a supportive collegial community or both, a good therapist remains a wonderful resource of which to avail yourself.
I know seeing a therapist carries a stigma in certain communities. I am aware that not everyone has the financial resources to contract such services. And, I know that not all psychotherapy is equally effective, not all psychotherapists equally skilled. Like any intimate relationship, rapport, trust, and timing all play a part in determining the efficacy of the endeavor. We benefit from different guidance at different times. And yet, for all of the variables involved, a good therapist can be quite helpful.
One of my good friends and teaching partners once told me that he thinks of living life like being in a boxing ring. Whether the blows come from outer circumstances, inner challenges, or some combination of both, many of us benefit from regular space and time to stop dancing around, dodging opponents, and throwing punches. Therapy is a chance to leave the ring for an hour— to sit down, take off our gloves, remove our mouthguard, get some strategy, encouragement, and a little first aid. My point is you don’t have to be falling apart to have someone in your corner, on your side, helping you fight the good fight.
Sometimes yoga people don’t like fighting analogies, but the tradition is full of martial references and offers us plenty of reminders to fight those battles which are most meaningful and ultimately worthwhile, so for me, the boxing metaphor works. In fact, I know very few people right now who aren’t feeling a bit beat up by modern life. In a recent conversation with my therapist, I was talking about how nourishing the shorter form classes I was offering seemed to be for people in the face of their fatigue, depression, and anxiety. She said that she had just come from a meeting with some of her colleagues who all reported that their clients were reaching the limits of their capacity for resilience. The relentlessness of our current times is wearing many people down and their self-care strategies are not even as effective as they used to be, if they are even managing to do them at all. As it turns out, at a more collective level, finding that “time out of the ring” is getting increasingly more difficult with each passing month of the pandemic and its cascading effects.
And since I am writing these essays as advice to new teachers, I will simply say that as a new teacher, a good therapist is a good idea. And it might be that you are through your initial teaching anxieties and you are on a good roll with your teaching such that you can’t imagine burn out, conflicts with students or fellow teachers, and you have yet to make a lot of mistakes. That’s okay, ride the waves of enjoyment and just file this advice away for a later time when you have been in the ring a while, the bumps and bruises have added up a bit, you are suffering, and even the yoga doesn’t seem to help you in the same way it once did.
And when the time comes that you do call the therapist, my additional advice is to find someone who works with the body in some way or with the unconscious through some sort of depth psychological framework so you can get underneath your very smart mind to the good stuff. Spiritual practitioners can be notoriously hard to treat in therapy because of our training. We tend to have good answers, great philosophical perspectives, and positivity perspectives that sometimes work against us when we are stuck emotionally. (Of course, that might not be you, but if it is, just know you are in very fine company.)
Also, I think there are a lot of ways to get out of the ring for a while. In fact, that’s how a lot of our practices can function— from therapy to asana, meditation to journal writing, mantra to walks in nature. So, find therapy however and whenever you can.
All right, keep the faith. More soon.
And, here are my announcements about the month ahead!
I have done my best to include offerings of different lengths and levels this month. I added a two-part Level 2 Back Bending Class, a two-part series called Full-Spectrum Short Form Practice and a 4-part Anusara® yoga series this month.
Depth in the Basics: Level 1/2 continues on Tuesday, Dynamic Alignment: Breathe! continues on Wednesdays as does Expanding Capacity: Level 3. With my travel schedule and thanksgiving, we have only two Thursday night class of Dedicated Action: Level 2/3, but given that its one of my favorite classes, I couldn’t bear to cancel it entirely.
My long-time friend, Darren Rhodes and I are offering a wonderful 5-part series of dharma teaching, sharing, and writing exercises designed to help you harvest the lessons of the past cycle and initiate a new year with clarity and grace. And we have a plan for a workshop together in person January 14-16, 2022.
Can’t commit to a full series? You can drop in!
